The script of a short video holds in a few lines, and yet it decides everything. Here an extra constraint applies: the audience immediately penalises an over-salesy tone.
The first three seconds decide everything
That is the part of the script deserving the most work, and receiving the least.
What works: coming in mid-action, showing the problem rather than announcing it, asking a question the audience mentally answers with yes.
What does not work: introducing yourself, announcing the plan of the video, thanking the brand, starting with the product name.
A simple rule: if the first sentence can be removed without the video losing its meaning, it must be.
The structure that sells
Four blocks, in that order, and the total length stays under a minute.
The problem, shown in two seconds.
The solution, in action, with no superfluous commentary.
The proof: a figure, a duration, a comparison, an honest before and after.
And an ending that asks nothing impossible: a simple gesture, not a commercial injunction.
That structure works in almost every category, and it tolerates being repeated with different openings.
Why the French audience penalises a salesy tone
That is a particularity translated scripts ignore, and it costs dearly.
Emphasis formulas from elsewhere, stacked superlatives, constant enthusiasm, artificial urgency: all of that triggers mistrust here rather than interest.
What lands better: reserve, nuance, the admission of a limit, discreet humour, the tone of somebody recounting rather than selling.
The practical consequence is simple: come down a notch. A script that seems slightly too flat in writing will generally be right when spoken.
What the legal framework requires
Three elements, independent of tone.
The identification of the commercial nature, visible and comprehensible, including when the video looks like personal content.
The claims, which the brand must be able to prove, particularly in health, food, cosmetics, finance and the environment.
And the mentions specific to certain categories, which are not negotiable.
These rules depend on the product and the medium, and are checked with a lawyer before the shoot rather than after the edit.
Write three hooks, not one
It is the cheapest method for improving a campaign.
The body of the video is shot once. The first three seconds are shot three times, one after another, in the same light.
You get three comparable videos, and the comparison teaches more than an intuition.
Subtitles are part of the script
They are not a transcription, they are a rewrite.
A spoken sentence often runs to fifteen words, a readable subtitle to five. The work consists in keeping the meaning while removing the linking words.
Two rules: never more than two lines on screen, and never a word split across two shots.
What the first sentence must contain
| Type | What it promises | What must follow |
|---|---|---|
| A question | A recognised doubt | The answer, not another question |
| A statement | A verifiable fact | Its demonstration |
| A refusal | What you stopped doing | What you do instead |
What is cut from a hook
The greeting, the self-introduction, the brand name and any sentence announcing what the video will say. The viewer wants the thing, not its announcement.
What is tested across three versions
The same edit, three different openings, the same run time and the same budget. The comparison only means something under that condition.
How to train
One exercise, ten minutes a week.
Take a video that stopped you and transcribe its first five seconds word for word.
You will almost always see the same thing: a short sentence, a concrete verb, no promise, and an image already showing what is being talked about.
